[homebunnyj]

As far as your filter clogging, you can swish the filter pad gently in a buck of dechlorinated water, for instance, the old water you siphon out of your tank when you do a water change. Chlorine will kill off your bacteria.

Water changes are essential during a fish-in cycle in order not to kill off all your fish. You do have to keep ammonia and nitrite below 1.0 for them to survive. Of course, you dechlorinate the water before you add it to the tank, and the dechlorinator should be the only chemical you use. Your gf can return the ph stuff and get something useful instead, like an extra bottle of dechlor or an algae scrubber, or an ornament or something. And tell her not to listen to the store employees when they try to sell her something else.

(Yes, water changes do make the cycling process take longer, maybe up to two months, but no water changes make for dead fish.)

If your water got brown-cloudy, it means your filter pad needs swishing out, or that you haven't been vacuuming your substrate very well. Some say not to vacuum during the cycle, but I disagree, as noobs tend to overfeed and get a buildup of excess rotting food and waste in the gravel. That brings me to another point, you should feed lightly during a fish-in cycle to help avoid rapid ammonia buildup. Once every other day, only enough that they will consume in a couple of minutes, is sufficient.

If your water is white-cloudy, congratulations! You have a bacterial population explosion, a positive step forward in establishing the nitrogen cycle in your tank! Let it be, it will clear up in a few days. It might take a week or even somewhat longer, but at least you'll know what to tell all the people who come in and say, "Dude, what's with your tank, it looks awful!"

If your tank is green-cloudy you have green water (algae) and should look at how much light your tank gets.

And, yes... if you've had those fish in the tank for more than a few days, your test results should not all be zero... you should have at least some ammonia in there. So do study up on the test instructions and try again. Do you have the test kits with test tubes and drops? They are much better than the strips, and cheaper in the long run too.